Tuesday, December 22, 2009

The Good News

After two rounds of chemo therapy and more importantly lots of acupuncture, tong ren, tuina, and loads and loads of positive energy from people around the world the results are in from the CT scan.

80% reduction in the liver masses
95% reduction int he pancreatic mass
no evidence of lymph or lung involvement

So the plan I think..... I am going to go 1 month with no chemo then have another scan. This means that I have a renewed energy for being ultra vigilant with the tong ren and acupuncture. What if I can show my doctor that it really is not the chemo that did it but rather the tong ren....what if I can help spread the word.... more importantly what if I can convince myself that the tong ren really works? The down side to this plan is that it involves another scan. I almost cried during todays scan. It just feels so uncertain. Some sources say that it is like have between 400 and 600 x-rays and increases the risk of cancer by a significant amount and my doctor says that the scan is like having one x-ray. Who to believe. What is the risk? Is there a long term that I need to be careful about?

I am realizing that knowing how much improvement there is is going to help me believe and be ultra-vigilant but the risk might be pretty huge. That will make 5 scans in about 6 months. That is a lot. My plan is that the tumors will have continued to shrink over the month and the next scan will be the last for a long time. My doctor came up with this plan even though he thinks I should continue with the chemo right now. That's is a pretty cool doctor that he could find something that would feel pretty good to me even though it is not what he thinks I should do.

Side notes.... I feel physically really good. Emotionally I stopped taking the anti-depressant I think before it kicked in. The depression has loosed its grasp on me over the last week. Hopefully that is a trend.
I am getting out and about. I had visits from Ziggy and Karen this week. Two highlights of my week. Karen was a great sport and came skiing with me at night. She used some crappy skis that I found in the trash with boots that were way too big, and she said she liked it. Nice.
I spent the weekend with Suzanne and Rebecca in Boston. I got to experience a big snowfall in the city and how peaceful the city gets when driving becomes challenging enough that its not worth doing.
I was sad today to read that another friend has been diagnosed with fibromyalgia. It makes me want to scream..... enough already. Its been a year since I openned myself up for adventure for a year, no more I am closed now to adventure. This year I am only open to positive adventures. I feel certain that she will get a lot of support. Maybe I can learn to be a healer on the fast track so that I will say things like Tom Tam.... "fibromyalgia no problem" and believe it.


  1. Yay Tamar! That is so exciting! I am so curious what you will find out about your healing choices. Thank you so much for being so open about it all!

    Love you, Arjen

  2. YAYYYY! This is such wonderful news Tamar. So very happy for you. Sending you lots of love and healing energy, as always, and hopes that your holiday is wonderful. Love you!! xoxox

  3. Great news, Tamar! I'm so happy to hear it!

  4. This is awesome Tamar!! I am very relieved to hear that the visit did not tire you out too much and that the depression is lifting and this news about your CT scan is so incredible.

    It was so good to see you...Happy holidays and see you soon I hope.

    love, Suzanne

  5. Tamar that's GREAT!!!
    I will be sharing your news with
    my family over the holidays.
    Happy Holidays.
    Love, Danette

  6. I consider this news your personal Christmas gift to me -- my favorite one! Love you Tamar -- SO glad that there is some good news and a bit more lightness on your shoulders!

  7. Yippeee! And a trip home planned! It all sounds great, Tamar. Thanks so much for keeping us all posted... as well as for your support with my own body stuff.